i drove through a puddle and i heard the noise through the open windows

it reminded me of Italy.  the damp road

i love road trips through Italy especially in the evening

the mountains, lights, the brisk air, but the mountains

you feel like there is no place like that

that could make you feel so protected

it's just the feeling

with the music

and the atmosphere

you never want it to end

ever

all from that one puddle, i got this feeling

and then i foresaw the summer with my brother

being in Holland and then Italy with him

to converse with him in person and laugh and talk about everything i've done this year

he is the only person in the world who i can actually talk to.

most of the time when i talk to people, i rush and leave things out because i always feel

like they don't care for what i have to say.

with Daniel, i can say whatever i want for however long i want because i know he

cares for what i have to say

it makes me cry, i miss him a lot

i read his saved text messages sometimes and i feel so depressed

the whole dynamics of this household have changed

oh goodness i will never stop living in the minutes that have already jumped out the window

don't nobody know my troubles with God?????????????????